Mommy Mojo: How to Enjoy Fun Sex – Even When You’re Feeling UN-Sexy

Exhausted, Meagan grimaced at her husband and asked, “Really! How can you think about sex at a time like this?” She was trying to quickly clean up after dinner and his roaming hands on her hips only added to her stress.

“I don’t know,” replied her bewildered husband. “How can I NOT think about sex at a time like this?” He tried to hide his disappointment, but Meagan felt it anyway. Now she was starting to resent sex like one more chore, and the guilt trip certainly didn’t make her want to get it on. She had WORK to do, for goodness’ sakes!

As busy mom-preneurs, it is easy to let the busy-ness of children, commerce, homework and housework sap our most sensuous energy. Often we feel anything but sexy, and getting in the mood seems like more effort than it’s worth.

“Why in the world should I have to have sex when I’m not in the mood anyway?”

Asking, “Why should I HAVE to,” may not be the most empowering question to ask. Instead why not ask, “What might I gain by discovering GREAT sex with my mate on demand?”
Studies show that sex has many benefits, including more loving feelings, greater happiness, more personal peace, increased energy, improved health, increased self-esteem, better sleep, weight loss, and emotional connection.

So, there you go. Right at the top of the list are some of those elusive qualities that everyone longs for – basically love, joy and peace. Who knew – right in your marriage, waiting in your bedroom (or anyplace you want to spice it up), the key to love, joy and peace.

Conversely, refusing sex can cause spiraling emotions of resentment, stress and anger ,which can lead to insomnia, weight gain, loneliness and a host of other problems. Now, sex is by not any means the answer to all that ails us. But in the midst of everything else, it’s great to have a sex life that works like glue keeping a marriage intimate, refreshing and fun.

How to Go from Exhausted to Aroused?

Sometimes being exhausted or annoyed makes us worse than too tired for sex. It makes us down right AVERSE! In fact, I dedicated an entire chapter to the problem – “Help – My Husband Is Naked and It’s Grossing Me Out!” Have you ever felt like that?

Since that point of view helps no-one’s self esteem, let’s see what we can change. I truly believe that with a little instruction, it’s possible to move from averse to aroused. The best part is – YOU deserve to feel great, so why not?

My Secret and Oh-so Sexy Weapon: EFT Tapping

I spent years as the wife who could barely get in the mood. This was so hurtful to my husband – it was the only part of our marriage that caused fights – and it made me feel like something was wrong with me.

Little did I know that I could re-wire my sexual energy and go from dread to desire. One night while my naked husband lie waiting in the candlelight, I rushed into the shower and in desperation tried the wackiest thing I’d ever heard of.

We call it tapping, Emotional Freedom Technique, or EFT for short. It involves two things while literally tapping 7 or so times with your fingertips on acupressure targets on your face and torso:

1. Acknowledge your distressing emotion
2. Offer acceptance and forgiveness to yourself and whoever has contributed to the feeling.

The theory is that the combination of the tapping and the acceptance breaks the connection from the stressful stimulus (the thought of sex) and your body’s physical reaction (in my case – frigidness).

How to use EFT to Get in the Mood for Sex

What I discovered in that life-changing shower is that I had the power to change how I felt about sex. Follow along as you read, and see if you feel more relaxed about sex.

Since I was in a very anxious state, I let the water run all over me, while I rubbed my chest saying, “Even though I’m NOT in the mood for sex, I deeply love and accept myself anyway. Even though I’m NOT in the mood at all, and this will probably be a flop, I TOTALLY love and accept myself anyway. Even though I’m way too tired for this, I DEEPLY love and accept myself and my feelings.”

Then I tapped around my eye saying, “I am not in the mood!”
I tapped my upper and lower lip saying, “Totally not in the mood!”
I tapped my whole hand across my collarbone saying, “Sex right now is a BAD idea!”
I tapped the inside of my wrist saying “I am TOO TIRED!”

I repeated this process for about 10 minutes. Basically I just put my most anxious feelings into words –emphatically! As I did, the most amazing thing started happening. I felt in tune with my body. My skin felt good and I was completely relaxed without wanting to fall asleep. I had no idea what would happen next.

Eureka! As I lay down with my husband my whole body was tingly, responsive and orgasmic! Every kiss, every caress felt magical. I had the best sex I’d EVER had up till then. I was in touch with my senses. I felt good about myself. I felt good about my lover. From that night on, sex became a sanctuary. Sexual anxiety became a thing of the past.

The key to making sex fun when you’re not in the mood is to take charge of your own sex drive and energy and enjoy your senses, your self and your partner.

It’s called PLEASURE – and it certainly brings a host of GREAT and sexy benefits! Why not give it a try? You can tap yourself sexy, by taking some time to honor yourself and your sex life. You deserve to feel great tonight – and your mate? He DESPERATELY wants you to want him!

Want more of Gina’s secrets to GREAT Sex? Be sure to grab your free video: Secrets to Really Great Sex Tonight!