We live in a glorious era in which motherhood has become synonymous with audacious, adventurous, confident and perversely seductive. It’s the age of the MILF, or to put more crudely, Mom I’d Like to Fuck—an acronym both repulsive and appealing.
Repulsive particularly to our Matriarchal feminists of the 70′s, who would view ‘MILFdom’ not as a solution, but rather a self-destructive form of female-chauvinist piggery (heard that term somewhere and it stuck).
Are moms so afraid of seeming past their prime that they accept objectification as a compliment?
Yes, that would have been a mild version of what we would have heard from our militant sisters back then, when competition over sex and beauty among women was taboo and to be outlawed. Outlawed!
Why the colossal fascination with the hot mom, and why now?
Maybe it has to do with women’s conceiving later in life, and being more resistant to surrendering a sexuality they’ve spent decades building. Or, it could be that for ages women have been drawn towards the forbidden― bad boys, the ultimate seducers.
It could also be a looks thing, given that women—with the aid of Pilates, botox and nip/tuck, can turn back time to a sometimes alarming degree (ahem, Joan Rivers).
The evidence surrounds us, with MILF branding and tees, to the plethora of new hot housewife driven reality shows. We can also thank Demi and Madonna whose “cougar” relationships have played out most notably in the tabloids.
While Demi has worked relentlessly to earn her the MILF honor, women like Dina Lohan have failed miserably. Clearly not all MILFs are created equal. Demi seems to understand that the allure of the MILF lies between appearing both maternal and doable, like Madonna.
Dina Lohan, on the other hand, seems to have missed the mark completely―constantly pictured clubbing with Lindsay, sipping champagne, living off her daughter, and bragging to the media that she is more of a sister than a mom. Over-tanned and under-concerned about your daughter’s welfare and rehab, sorry to say Dina, makes you very un-hot. You, lady, are not a true MILF.
The twisted genius of this MILF culture, where blatant objectification is passed off as a compliment, has left us a bit conflicted. As modern sensual women, we’re torn by two fears: that having children will make us unsexy, and that trying to stay sexy will make us look ridiculous like…well..Dina Lohan.
There’s the exhausting pressure of wanting to have it all, be desirable during pregnancy and the race to snap your body back into shape (everywhere…where it counts) so that you can look forward to earth shattering sex…Hello, kegel! Then of course there’s that small detail of resurrecting your libido in between breastfeeding and diaper changing.
Is MILF an insult or a compliment? Personally I can’t think of any context where it wouldn’t be a compliment. I’d say it’s a crude compliment. It’s an observation that although you’re of an age to have had children, or even grandchildren, you’re still a damn sexy woman that your typical hot-blooded straight male would love to get naked with…and for most, it’s even a little more straightforward than that.
But in the end, we are suckers for the MILF. There is something captivating about a mom taking back the negligee, an image exuding an eroticism that suggests that motherhood is not the death of her desirability. Besides, the MILF fantasy unveils a whole slew of scenarios, role plays and seduction that are the ultimate for every man, young and old, married and single.
Get rid of your inhibitions and engage in a little role-playing in your marriage, and I guarantee you’ll add a little spice and everything nice…
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5 Comments
I love it! As a mother of two and a woman looking with a discerning eye at my sexuality, I’m happy to MILF status. I’d like to hear more posts about resurrecting libido, though. I still don’t completely trust mine and have other mom friends who, well after the diaper and breastfeeding years, also still find it a bit will-o-the-wisp.
I don’t know how I missed your comment..so although unfashionably late….
It is definitely a balancing act Kassandra — especially when you are raising a daughter and trying to set an example. It can challenge your ability to walk that fine line when you know your child is struggling with what is and isn’t correct or acceptable about a woman’s image, yet at the same time voice how proud they are of you that you take good care of yourself…and dress cool or tells you how “hot” you look.
Clearly we have a ways to go in today’s culture, but I think we’ll get there.
I would add that the reason mature women ARE more attractive is that they understand how to voice their preferences. All women are different, and what appeals to you might not necessarily be what appeals to the woman next door. Previously, first time sexual experiences would be “guessing games”, yet a cougar would be willing to say what she likes, and I find that HIGHLY attractive.
At least my 0.02$ from a male perspective. 🙂
Clearly you like animal prints on women..lol..though the mature women you favor are not all cougars..As older women, we’ve been there done that..explored long faithful relationships and have had time to hone those bed skills and our sensitivity to our partner’s needs. Women are sexual creatures so it should come as no surprise that with hormones, a renewed self-confidence and experience, comes passion and an insatiable appetite.
Just my .02 😉
In NYC
Im looking for a mature long term playmate.
thats a mouthful. I can do that too.
james at doclicks69@yahoo.com